American Values

Memorial Day Reflections

Happy Monday!  Today is Memorial Day, a holiday dedicated to celebrating the memory of those who gave their lives in military service.  Defending the United States of our country against its enemies has always been seen as a high calling from those who value “American ideals.”

I’m very interested in the concept of values. Knowing your core values is foundational to mental health. I wonder how many of us struggle with aligning what we value with what it means to be an American, especially in such a politically charged era.

The two major political parties, Republicans and Democrats, have lengthy documents on their websites outlining their party platforms. The Republicans have not updated their platform since their 2016 convention, citing COVID as the barrier to a 2020 revision. However, they have information at the top of their current document that endorses Donald Trump, calls out the media for being biased against Mr. Trump, and indicates an update to their platform document will be coming in 2024. The Democratic Party updated its platform document in 2020 and laid out its ideologies.  I’d encourage you to read through both PDFs.

I grew up in a conservative home and church, listened to Rush Limbaugh vociferously, and thought Ronald Reagan was the greatest President to ever live in my lifetime. I always sided with the espoused Republican ideas, like limited government, states rights, and abortion restrictions.  I thought welfare encouraged laziness and that trickle-down economics made a lot of sense.

And then I started counseling poor people with tons of trauma and learned that a lot of the things I’d been told weren’t accurate.  I began to lean left while staying relatively close to the center.  

Photo by Natilyn Photography on Unsplash

And then Donald Trump became President.

My disdain for what has happened to politics, decorum, and America is not a secret, as people have flocked to the personality cult of this narcissist.  In giving people permission to verbalize their racist, xenophobic, and fascist ideologies, his popularity among certain groups of people has only grown.  Many of those followers are blatantly voting against their best interests, which confuses me.  But it also makes me sad.

I do understand why rich, powerful white people would vote for Trump and his policies.  Their values seem to align with lower taxes for the wealthy. But what I don’t get is that the party of “less government” and “freedom” is hell-bent on restricting access to books, healthcare, and services that middle-class and poor people need.  Why are so many blue-collar folks favoring a man who despises them?  I think it's because they’re out of alignment.  I think the whole party is.

Photo by Caleb Fisher on Unsplash

The Republican Party was formed to end slavery, despite certain states fighting tooth and nail to retain “states' rights” to own people as property.  It was the party of equality and freedom for black folks who did not have any power.  But now, I am doubtful you find many Republicans who also embrace the idea that “Black Lives Matter.”  Many history books and other media will trace all the events that led us to now.  Most of them put the blame squarely on evangelical Christians, who arrogantly think their values are the only righteous and correct ones and wish to force those ideals on the rest of America.  That doesn’t sound like freedom to me.

Donald Trump’s character does not align with the kinds of Christian ideals I was taught growing up. Sexual ethics, turning the other cheek, taking accountability, asking for forgiveness, and accepting grace - are all things I thought were qualities we valued. Another misalignment.

I know firsthand that if you are force-fed dogma and fear, like what conservative media outlets like Fox News spread 24/7, you will become indoctrinated. If you consume too much Rachel Maddow and MSNBC, you also run the risk of paranoia and fear.  But I also know that if you open your eyes and mind to new experiences, talk to people who aren’t like you, and embrace cultural and spiritual humility, you will be awakened.  (As a friend said, I’m proud to be “woke” because it means I care about people.)

Ultimately, it took learning about myself to come into political and spiritual alignment. And it’s still a process that I anticipate will hopefully continue throughout my life. The freedom to disagree with each other is an important American value and one that I’m grateful for our soldiers for preserving. On this Memorial Day, I somberly mourn the loss of respect, a willingness to agree to disagree, and the unity that no matter our differences, both parties stood for democracy and freedom.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

I’m guessing that if you’ve made it this far without unsubscribing, you are at least willing to consider that I might be right and that you need to do some values work of your own to be fully prepared to vote in the next Presidential election.  I recommend Heather Cox Richardson’s daily newsletter, “Letters from an American,” as a good resource.  So are the books “Jesus and John Wayne” and “The Kingdom, the Power, and the Glory.”  Dan McLellan’s channels have also helped me understand my religious and spiritual ideals. And frankly, spending some time in thoughtful reflection and what I call “focus sessions” where I meditate and pray has been outstanding in my alignment journey.

As we think about those who have sacrificed for our country’s security today, I’d challenge you to evaluate what kind of country we want going forward.  Does your political affiliation align with your value system?

To those who served, thank you. I hope your service was not in vain.

This content is for educational and entertainment purposes and is not the same as therapy. If you need to talk to someone, go to PsychologyToday.com or one of the many online therapy platforms available and start treatment with a professional today!

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